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| lukematt |
 Posted: Thu Jan 01, 2009 6:42 am Post subject: Communist Work-Related Humor |
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Investing Associate
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How I Became Unemployed
I worked as the general director of a large company. My coffee was prepared by a nice-looking secretary, and I drove to work in a top-end, company car. One day, Communist leaders arrived and told me to give 5,000 Czechoslovak crowns for the funeral of a Communist Central Committee member. I told them, “For 5,000 crowns, I will bury the entire central committee by myself.”
From that time, I worked as the director of a little branch office. My coffee was prepared by an old secretary, and I drove to work in a mid-level, company car. One day, Communist leaders arrived and asked me why I hadn’t attended the last Communist party meeting. I told them, “If I had known it was really the last meeting, I would have arrived with a large ‘Hooray!’ sign.”
From that time, I worked as a foreman. I carried my coffee in a thermos, and I drove to work in my own low-end automobile. On the wall of my work area, I had two posters: Husak (chief of the Czechoslovak Communist Party / President of Czechoslovakia) and a sexy Western movie star:
 
One day, Communist leaders arrived and told me to take down that whore’s picture. So I took down Husak’s poster.
From that time, I worked as a ditch digger. I went to work on my bicycle. One day, Communist leaders arrived and told me, “Store your bike somewhere because a Russian delegation will tour the area.” I told the leaders, “Don’t worry—my bicycle is locked and has insurance.”
From that time, I am unemployed.
[From the Czech comedians Simek & Grossmann (both deceased)] |
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| DKnightSr |
| Posted: Thu Jan 01, 2009 2:45 pm Post subject: |
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Member of the Month
May
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He he he  Very Good! VERY good 
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
It was a sad day indeed when Ms Thatcher, Mr Carter, and Mr Putin all went to the pearly gates at the same time.
St. Peter greeted them, and asked Ms Thatcher "How many sins did you commit while Prime Minister of England?". She thought hard, and said "Well, there were one or two St Peter".
St Peter then said "That's not too bad. You will ride for eternity across the roads of heaven in a Cadillac".
Mr Carter was next, and St Peter asked "Soooo....Mr Carter. How many sins did YOU commit while President of the United States?". Mr Carter thought long and hard then replied "Well Sir, at least 3 or 4".
St Peter replied "Mr Carter, that's not so good, but you will still drive a Chevrolet for eternity through the streets of heaven".
A few days later, Margaret Thatcher was out cruising in her Cadillac, and spotted Jimmy Carter's Chevy by the side of the road. Upon closer examination, she found that Mr Carter had collapsed in the ditch, rolling in mirth!
"What ever is the matter Mr Carter?" she asked. Between belly laughs Carter replied..."Ha ha, he he, ho ho...I just saw Putin riding a skateboard!" |
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| striver |
| Posted: Mon Jan 05, 2009 4:41 pm Post subject: |
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Investing Associate
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| MarieRoseAnn |
| Posted: Wed May 05, 2010 3:10 am Post subject: |
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Investing Associate
Joined: 05 May 2010
Posts: 29
This Month: 30
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